Top 10 Dog Pet Peeves About Humans

• Yelling at me for barking. I am a dog


• Taking me for a walk then not letting me check stuff out. Exactly whose walk is this anyway?


• Any trick balancing food on my nose.


• Yelling at me for rubbing myself on your carpet. Why did you buy carpet?


• Getting upset when I sniff your guests. Sorry but I haven't quite mastered the handshake thing yet.


• Any haircut that involves bows or ribbons. Now you know why we chew your stuff up when you are not home.


• Taking me to the vet for "The big snip", then acting surprised when I freak out everytime we go back.


• Doggie Sweaters.


• The sleight of hand, fake fetch throws. You fooled a dog! What a proud moment for the top of the food chain.